Wall of Shame
When I was young, my father began to give me guidelines for places to eat out, and how to avoid making really poor culinary decisons in restaurants. Some are funny, many are off-the-wall, but the advice he gave me was sound, and prior to my “Wall of Shame,” I give you these rules–most of which came from my Dad (either directly or indirectly), and still serve as outstanding advice for anyone–whether you’re in your home town, looking to try someplace new, or in a town far from your home and just hoping to find something good. I feel obliged to share the list with you today, and add on to it as my father recalls more of the list.
Dad’s Rules of Life for Eating Out
Rule #6 – Don’t ever eat hot peppers (like habaneros), and then go to the restroom.
Rule #7 – Life is too short to drink cheap beer.
Rule #10 – Only eat sushi if the sushi chef is Japanese.
Rule #11 – Never eat sushi or raw seafood in a country where you cannot drink the water.
Rule #12 – Only eat in Mexican restaurants that display a crucifix and a likeness of “our Lady of Guadalupe”.
Rule #13 – Only eat in BBQ restaurants where the silverware does not match.
Rule #14 – Never eat sushi in a restaurant that advertises Korean, Chinese, or Thai cuisine in addition to sushi.
Rule #21 – Don’t ever eat at a restaurant named after a sports team.
If you came here looking for a list of really, really bad restaurants, you should probably read “Joe’s Shit List” on Yelp. While the list includes more than restaurants, it should give you what you’re looking for.